Words Are Not Enough

“The most basic of all human needs is the need to understand and be understood. The best way to understand people is to listen to them.” -Ralph Nichols

I am a talker. Holly’s childhood nickname for me was JabberLips, and my incessant ability to make a song out of every road sign and billboard we passed proved her to be correct. My mouth is like a festering volcano—the urge to spill words bubbles up to the surface until the control gives way and thoughts bursts out sans control or care. And though I’m considered a young woman now, I must confess I still struggle with my desire to talk, talk, talk.

In various conversations and sermons, the topic of listening has emerged. Back in July, it was said that to be a good listener, we must turn ourselves off. What? Turn my thoughts off and STOP talking? No! Obviously that one stuck with me. And then, in late August, this thing called listening came up again. This time I thought I’m a pretty good listener, even if I do like to talk. I’m just good at both. As you can see, my imperious ability to reason with myself was struggling to come up with an adequate excuse. By the third and fourth occurrence of communication popping up in conversations, I could no longer convince myself I was a good listener. I’m a firm believer that God uses people in our lives to speak to us, and I believe He’s been telling me something (practically hitting me over the head with it). I need to be a better listener.

Words are not enough. When a friend is hurting, she does not need advice from me. When a coworker is disgruntled about work ethic, he does not require my opinion or experience. They need to be understood. While I have one mouth—I have two ears. Perhaps there’s a reason for that!

In the first ten verses of Proverbs 1, listening or gaining wisdom is mentioned six times. Obviously it’s important for understanding wisdom and instruction, so it can be equally important for understanding those around us. Here’s to turning ourselves off and genuinely listening to those who are both easy and difficult to love. Now, please excuse me, there’s someone here who needs to talk to me about something. :)